Do it Anyway: The Power of Showing Up in the Midst of Uncertainty

Go for your goals, set you high intentions - that is a great way to show up in the world! If we balance that out with holding loosely to the outcomes along the way - we will all just be happier people!

That is not always easy, that is why I have an accountability group and a coach - to stay objective and hold space when things aren't going the way I had hoped.

Who are your support people?
What is your process for show up fully and playing full out while holding loosely to the outcome?

Have a solid morning routine is crucial along with tools that work for you.  A mindfulness practice that is accompanied by Breathwork and Aromatherapy works for me. If you need some ideas, I created a guide, download it here and see how you can reimagine your mornings!  https://www.reimaginewellness.org/morningshift   

Try the Headspace App and decrease your stress! And add the headspace voice to your Waze app and enjoy the journey!

Here is the link to how I have been using Cilantro and Breath Prayer to ground myself into an intention to hold loosely to outcomes and go all in for living fully, loving openly, imagining what is possible and a desire to inspire others to live their dreams. 
https://youtu.be/RunJyiHOoic

Transcript

0:59

Welcome back. It's time to default to your extraordinary self. I'm your host, Julie Reynolds, on the journey with you. in life you will encounter heartache challenges and struggles and we can't control the outcomes that only how we show up in the midst of it all. Our only job is to keep moving forward with courage and determination, kindness and compassion. I have a lot of travel analogies in my head because we just made the long drive from Nashville to Orlando and back. I have my Waze app set to the Headspace voice. It's a very mindful, meditative voice. that gives commentary along the way and reminders when you turn make a turn this is a good time to take a deep breath is one of the things that it says a lot of times and enjoy the journey is another reminder when approaching an obstacle the app reminds us to approach with compassion for others Traveling and commuting can be stressful and to mitigate those stresses, especially in weather on our way back. We were navigating around a storm system and we kept checking the radar to see when that would be in our path. and I, at one point asked my husband, are you racing the storm or what is your goal here? Because we only have one route, right? But he just wanted to know ahead of time that was going to help him. Navigate that where he was going to be driving and if we were going to stop or not would make a, would be depending on that. Now we can't control the weather, right? So heavy rain can affect your visibility. And in those instances, leaning on mindfulness practice is very helpful to take some slow deep breaths in and really give attention to the road in front of you. Now, Headspace has made this a little easier and taught us that we can't always control the traffic we can't always control the traffic of the mind, but we can learn to navigate it and take a different perspective that has always been, that can be very helpful in situations of high stress when we're commuting or when we're traveling, driving a long way. In fact, in more than 25 published studies in some of the leading mindfulness peer review journals. Headspace has been shown to have favorable outcomes of interventions, including reduced stress and improved focus and decreased aggression. in fact, they make the claim that headspace reduces stress 10 days and 30 days of headspace reduce stress by a third and negative emotions by 28%. That's pretty cool, right? And it's very simple to use. It's a guided, you can set it for, it doesn't take a lot of time and it's free. They do have a paid version, but they also have a free version that you can try out and see, can you reduce your stress? So if that's something you want to check out, I'm putting a link in the show notes to that's a tool that I have used for years and I love it. Um, and I found it very helpful. It's actually how I learned my mindfulness. I needed a guide and the Headspace app was that guide. All right. So knowing that you have power to overcome anything that comes your way is very freeing. So embracing that journey and trusting your ability to navigate through storms because it is in facing those challenges that we really discover our inner strength and that capacity that we have for greatness, really the truth is that along the way people are going to deceive or disappoint or even betray you at times. political factors might prevail. Criticism from others can come up receiving rejections for your offers and services and products that you offer. Is not only possible, it's inevitable. You can write a book and then receive more rejections than you care to count before it's accepted. Your request for the raise or the opportunity, the date might be turned down and initial failures to make honor roll or secure lead roles or gain admission to the desired school. Those are common and you might miss out on a promotion. You could. Find yourself in an experience where you're being excluded or ignored. Not hitting your desired goals on time is not only a possibility, but a likelihood sometimes. We can embrace that our ability to control our response and then let it guide us to towards that growth and that peace that we desire in those times of challenge and conflict. Our ability to choose our response again is very freeing and by embracing this control, We open up that path that we want to be on now. one effective tool that I like to use and the practical technique that can add us add to aid in that journey is to engage in conscious breathing exercises. These exercises provide that valuable pause before we react and offering that little gift of time to respond thoughtfully and intentionally and just reset the flaring emotions and take you out of that fight or flight maybe response that you're having physiologically and into a more controlled environment in your brain. This is a mindful approach where we can align our actions and our true intentions and uphold that integrity in. really every situation. So taking a deep breath, centering yourself and let your response be a reflection of the peace and the growth that you wish to cultivate. We can actually do this right now. Our breath is always with us So maybe you're on your way to somewhere where you don't, where you're anticipating maybe some difficulties, Maybe you're in the midst of a conflict or trying to decide how you want to respond or how you want to show up. You can always just take three deep breaths. So let's just take three deep breaths together and reset the moment and if that's you and if not, just enjoy the peace that it brings and by slowing your heart rate and just having some perspective and being present. Maybe take this opportunity if you haven't already to set some intentions for your day or for your week. So let's take three deep breaths together, breathing in through the nose and letting it out. Again, inhale and one more deep breath. Again, that's a moment. And then that is a mindset and a tool that you can come back to at any time during your day. Now, I'm preparing a talk on aromacognition right now, and I posted, I actually posted a video on my use of cilantro recently. So if you're curious, check that out. I'll put the link in the show notes. I love aromatherapy and breath work as tools that help me show up aligned with my intentions. And science really has a lot to say about the power of aroma for anchoring and accessing memories And with some practices, we can also trigger intentions, emotions, and resets by using aroma. So I like both of these tools and I love to use them together. And you don't have to go and get certified in aromatherapy or breathwork like I did. It was just my way of learning those techniques. And so that because I know that I'm inclined to, once I learned something, want to share it. Learning it that way was good for me, but you don't have to. That's the beauty of these two tools is they are simple enough. So there's a lot of different ways that we can have these tools that we can use for anyone to use at any point and we can have them with us at all times. I always have an essential oil in my pocket and a lot of times it is aligned with an intention that I have set currently on something that I'm working on. And so it just made sense to me to also try to see if I can be intentional about triggering some of these emotions and intentions by using these tools. Science has long been fascinated by the power of smell and it's been It's uncovering layers of understanding recently, even that reveal just how influential our sense of smell is in our daily life. And this sense of smell is really goes a lot of times under underrated as far as being an intentional tool for memory, emotion, and even human connection. We rely on smells to, if we smell gas, or we smell disease, that's something that I really learned a lot about in my early days of nursing. Learning to detect disease and infection through the sense of smell. We could even get ahead of some of our diagnostic tools by paying attention to that. And that was one of the things that helped me. I was most fascinated by in school. Now, it wasn't until four years later that I really honed into aroma as a therapy, but regardless, and even now, I appreciate that we need more rigor in our current research bank on essential oils as aromatherapy. to enable us to make changes in a medical model of practice. But I'm a holistic nurse and a certified clinical neuromatherapist, and I can get, and I get to make practice decisions based on all types of evidence, including expert opinion, case studies, and even the precautionary principle. When there's little risk and great reward, I can venture out there because I'm not a, I'm not a provider within the medical community. model. Now I know that practicing in my hospital practice, I have to be a little bit more sensitive to that. So that said, I believe I've gotten really good at carefully navigating the line between professional curiosity and the personal appeal that fragrances can evoke. Regardless, this is a tool that I think we can really tap into. Now the core of smells power, it's really that direct line to the brain's limbic system. And it's an area. Deeply involved. And that's the area that's deeply involved in emotion and memory. Studies have shown that sense can evoke vivid memories, transporting us back to the time with a vividness that sights and sounds cannot match. This is a phenomenon known as the protean memory effect, and that underscores the emotional weight. Smell carries. It's as if the scent is a key unlocking that deep seated memories and feelings that we might not even realize we've stored away. It's fascinating how it just a whiff of childhood perfume or the aroma of a meal that we don't even recall consciously can evoke. A strong, such a strong emotional response, it's almost transcendent. I was walking in a botanical garden last week and I got a whiff of something sweet, like strawberries. And I immediately was transported to my appreciation for Twizzlers. And Twizzlers were also associated with movie experiences. Band moms always had Twizzlers and we would pass them around. That's a good memory that I had. And I just I really liked Twizzlers. Probably one of my favorite candies if I had to say. If I had to pick a favorite candy, probably Twizzlers would be it. All right. So we were anywhere, we were near a rose garden and my best guess is that the fruity undertones of roses that sometimes can resemble that scent of strawberries might've been the trigger. Now as a side note, science has also become, began to explore the social dimensions of smell and we're learning more about what, how we do in fact smell stress, even if we're not perceiving it consciously. So if you're in the room with somebody who's very anxious, you might be picking that up. Now, research indicates that humans can subconsciously detect pheromones chemical signals, and those are sub chemical signals that can influence our behavior and our perceptions of others. That's that invisible dance of molecules that might play a role and attraction, and helping us to explain that mysterious che chemistry that we have or that connection that we have with certain individuals. And it's as though our noses can pick up on that unseen aspects of compatibility. Maybe love at first sight should actually be love at first smell. I don't know. Anyway, all of this has me incorporating or experimenting really with the various aromas and how I anchor myself in truth and often replacing old soundtracks like negative self talk with thinking that serves me better, empowering me to show up in the way that I really want to and training my brain to cooperate with me as I go and I set these goals. Now, speaking of intentions of goals. Why did the perfume decline the job offer? because it didn't want to be missed. Okay. All I'm a little embarrassed now. My son encouraged me to incorporate humor And so there it is, folks. All right, I'll keep working on it. All right, back to the actual topic. Now I'm starting to remember back to the time that I sat in church the preacher would wrap up the talk by circling back around to the first and main point of the message. And I'm thinking now, this could have been a 10 minute message instead of 60. But all yeah. Anyway, even in that moment, it would serve me to remember you can't control the outcome. You can only control how you show up. now for me, there is a great peace and a freedom in focusing on that only thing I can always control or influence or direct in my life, and that's how I show up. and I choose to show up and play full out. To live fully, to love openly, to imagine what is possible and seek to inspire others along the way. And hopefully something I say here along the way will be an inspiration to you as well. I wanna put myself out there and give my best and serve where I can, whether I get a yes or no, whether anyone listens to this podcast or not, I'm going to record it anyway. because I really only have control over how I show up. And how I might put my voice out there in the world. Now that's the thought, and that's the thought I want us to ponder this week. In your life, and in your experiences, how will you choose to show up? I will tell you that when I started this podcast, it was because of a nurse. We had this, we were having this conversation about how we show up and she was sharing with me a goal of hers. And I was asking her why she hadn't pursued it. And she turned it on me and I said I've always wanted to start a podcast. So she said, why don't you start a podcast? I didn't have a good answer. It was mostly because what if nobody listens? What if it's a lot of time and energy and it doesn't really have the impact that I want it to. So what if I don't connect with others or inspire others or what if it fails? What if it sounds terrible? all of those things that I can't control, but what I do have control over is if I put my thoughts together and I hit the little record button. So that's what I did. I realized I didn't have any good reasons. I went home and I hit record. So how will you choose to show up this week? There are many things and people and outcomes that we can't control. We can influence. Yes, but control, no. When we try to control the outcome or we try to control the opinions of others, We just end up causing our own misery. Now I'm finding that our power, attention, and energy is best suited to be focused where the choice is a hundred percent ours with ourselves, and how we choose to play at the game of life here and now, regardless of the outcome. I'm going to leave us with a poem written by Kent Keith, and it was made famous by. Or more well known by Mother Teresa hanging the framed version of this poem on her wall in her home. It's called Do It Anyway. People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self centered. Forgive them anyway. If you're kind, people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you're successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies. Succeed anyway. If you're honest and frank, people may cheat you. Be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight. Build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today, people often forget tomorrow. Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough. Give the world the best you've got anyway. You see the final analysis? It is between you and your God. It was never between you and them anyway. I hope you will share this episode and That's so helpful to me. Let me know what you want to talk about. Until next time, may you find your focus on showing up powerfully presence. Fully engaged and loving no matter what, as you get up every day and default to yes, your extraordinary self.