Getting Into the Rythym of Getting the Results You Want

Not getting the results you want? In this episode we discuss how too often we leave our aspirations to randomness, relying on motivation to keep us moving forward. 

 Discover the power of rhythm in achieving your goals. Small, consistent actions can create momentum. Let’s chat about your journey to growth! #Rhythm #Growth

Recommended Reading: 

• Atomic Habits by James Clear: https://amzn.to/4eyVlj8
• Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg, PhD: https://amzn.to/4eyjWVc
• Grit: The Power of  Passion and Perserverance: https://amzn.to/3Vu6ed6
• The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy: https://amzn.to/3VUlr8Z

Transcript

juli: 0:59

welcome to another week of extraordinary We're going to talk about something that I've been processing for a while now, really. And as I head into a busy work week in a schedule that really It feels like a barrier to any progress. I've been working really hard to design a strategy in which to get through this week and continue to move forward. So I'm setting some intentions for the week and just really really, really, really Managing like rhythm and how you keep momentum going when things kind of pop up and maybe unexpected. And some of those things that are expected momentum plays a pivotal role in achieving our personal and professional growth, Just like in physics, where momentum is the product of mass and velocity, the thing that is in motion stays in motion. In our lives, momentum is that accumulation of consistent efforts that propel us towards our goals. And this is important when it comes to health issues, when it comes to business, any, any, really any goals that we have is a key aspect of building and maintaining momentum is also the concept of rhythm versus randomness. And this is that thing that I always say, like, I can't start and stop all of the time. It takes so much energy to get there. moving again when I stop, and maybe you can relate to that. So this principle can be a game changer of that rhythm versus randomness in how we approach growth, productivity, and success. So when I say rhythm, I'm referring to a structured, consistent approach to rhythm. to tasks and goals and involves creating and sticking to routines that continually foster productivity and progress. On the other hand, randomness is characterized by that sporadic efforts of an unpredictable patterns that often lead to that inconsistency and lack of sustained progress. I deal with a lot of this in health goals and business goals, because both of those things are things that I, that require some momentum. So to. design a strategy of moving consistently or any workout that's going to actually give me the results I want, I have to be consistent. And my schedule is not consistent. So I might have two days off in a row and then work three days and then we move into the weekend. And so if I don't build in some kind of consistency, and then honestly, when I get off work, I just, I don't I have good intentions, but sometimes it's actually resistance that keeps me from doing it. And sometimes it's just physical fatigue. But whatever my reasons are, I have not yet mastered the rhythm of that. Another area that I struggle with this is in business. I really do need some consistent times that are available to, to create clients and to work with my existing clients. I have things that I want to move forward in on that. because of my work, I can't establish a consistent schedule that is the same every week. in my work situation, we have a six week template, so I can design a strategy based on six weeks, a six week pattern. And that has worked for my business a little better now that I'm kind of getting the hang of it. and I'm starting to see the momentum building and I'm starting to see some of that growth happening as I stick to that routine. And so, and that, Momentum is what's going to be able to allow me to experience some exponential growth and really get somewhere for a lot of years. Really, I was just moving with my schedule and trying to do as much as I could on the days that I had available or the times I had available, but I always felt like I was starting over. So I would work three days in a row, and then I'd feel like on that next day, besides all I wanted to do is recover from the three previous days, I. Felt like I was having to spend time and energy forming a new plan instead of just moving in that rhythm so that rhythm versus randomness. Rhythm is that structured, consistent approach to tasks and goals. And then randomness is that sporadic efforts, unpredictable patterns that lead to that inconsistency and lack of progress. Really? Now, experts emphasize the importance of rhythm. And you can see that in a lot of the books that we read about habits and change in the book, Atomic Habits by James Clear, he emphasizes that small, consistent actions are far more effective than sporadic, intense efforts. It clearly argues that habits form on the backbone of rhythm or routine, really enabling us to make steady progress over time. Dr. B. J. Fogg, A behavioral scientist at Stanford University also supports this in his book, Tiny Habits. Dr. Fogg discusses how breaking down those goals into small and manageable tasks, and then integrating them into daily routines can really help us create that rhythm and enhance and get that momentum going. that when actions become habitual, they require less cognitive effort, making them easier to sustain momentum and achieve long term growth. And I think that's Makes sense, right? That doesn't probably have to be explained too much. Now, I found that most everyone wants to make some kind of change, eat healthier, lose weight, exercise more, reduce stress, get better sleep. we want to be better parents and partners. We want to be more productive and creative. But there's that gap, that painful gap that between what we want and what we actually do. and then we blame that disconnect between what we want and do on a whole lot of things. Most of the time we blame it on, on ourselves and we beat ourselves up about it. Many of us believe that if we fail to be productive or if we fail to lose weight or exercise regularly, then something must be wrong with us. And you just heard me actually explain that the reason why I don't exercise regularly is the fault of my job, right? So we're always blaming something. I took my swimsuit with me to work because I had a hunch that I was going to be getting off a little earlier than my scheduled time. And so I wanted to be prepared. So I had my things in the car and when the time came, I didn't want to go. And so I offered to stay another hour and do something for someone. And that was going to be the reason why I couldn't go. And then my husband asked me to go to the store and that was another reason why I couldn't go swimming. actually put a lot of effort into thinking about this planning. It. Finding reasons why I couldn't actually make it work. I was making a lot of decisions and this kind of goes to that. If I had a routine and I had something that I was sticking to, I was in a rhythm. I wouldn't have to go through all of this cognitive effort to get myself to the swimming pool or get myself to the Y to work out. This is where I can do some thought work and recognize the resistance and really dive into what was coming up for me in this. And why don't I have a routine? And, and knowing that I can. I can prevent this. In the future. By having a plan and getting into a rhythm and already knowing what I'm going to do and sticking to, and just sticking to it. this was a throw in, right. I was going to get off work early and throw in a time to get to the pool. And if my fitness goals rely on throw ins on just throwing in a workout. When I get off work early. Making those decisions on the fly. Instead of a routine, I'm probably not going to get the results that I really want. many of us believe that if we fail to be more productive, if we fail to lose weight or exercise regularly, then there's something must be wrong with us. If we could just be better people, we could, we wouldn't have failed. If we only followed that program to the letter, kept the promises to ourselves, we would have succeeded. then we think I just need to get my act together and make this happen. we have a gazillion different ideas coming at us all day long, every day about all the things and the strategies, the things that we could do that would make this better if we just follow the plan. and then we beat ourselves up because we don't follow it. It didn't work for us. Why didn't it work for us? Well, it's maybe because a bazillion reasons why, again, we're beating, we beat ourselves up about that. I want to borrow an idea from the book. Tiny habits and suggesting that maybe it's a design flaw, not a personal flaw and that building habits and creative, creating positive change can be easy if you have the right approach. a system that is based on how human psychology really works, and a process that makes change easier. Tools that don't rely on guesswork and faulty principles. This is where we really need to be. I started Dasana. Dasana. After my yoga classes and that, and the conversation in that space really fascinates me. It's a little like getting those favorite things, pages and women's magazines narrated to you. There's always a group of women. Sharing all the amazing things, recipes, products, systems that have changed their lives. This week, it was apple cider vinegar nutritional yeast, some shoes that are just amazing and never wear out the most amazing skincare ever. I can't believe people don't know about this. The best protein drink the world has ever known. And then there is the one person who chimes in. I tried that and it didn't work, which also then makes me, I want to ask all the things. How long did you try it? What did, what do you mean it didn't work? What was the outcome and how did you measure it? Because in my experience, people, myself included, try things and if they don't feel better in a very short period of time, they quit. And move on to something else. Maybe it'll be the next suggestion that they hear in the sauna. Now, maybe, maybe the exception to the rule is those women who probably show up every day and power lift and do their cardio and then sauna. They've earned that spot in the sauna and to share their world's greatest solutions to everything. And I give them props for that. Now, popular thinking about habit formation and change kind of comes feeds into our impulse to set unrealistic expectations. We know habits matter. and we just need more good habits and fewer bad ones. But here we are still struggling to change and still thinking that it's our fault. Now, all my research and coaching experience tells me that it is all about mindset and our willingness to train our brains, our willingness to stick in there to see what. We're really capable of choosing which discomfort we want. Potential growth or possible regret. Discomfort is just part of life. We aren't going to be able to avoid it and we don't get to choose all of the things that are going to bring discomfort our way, but we do get to choose this one. We get to choose where this will come from. I think it's a little more painful to think about the things that I didn't do that I didn't try always wondering what was possible, then it would be the discomfort to try and even fail sometimes So it's all part of just being alive and being a human, having that human experience and choosing. where you're going to experience a lot of your discomfort here in giving up or in growing. So we can do a couple things in here. First of all, stop judging yourself, and then take your aspirations. You have to know what they are and break them into tiny behaviors that you can do along the way and that you can be consistent at. And then embracing mistakes as, as we learn and grow and use them to move forward. this whole process may not feel very intuitive. And this is where strategies come into play. Self criticism is its own kind of habit for a lot of people. Blaming yourself is just where your brain goes. And that's aromacognition coaching that I've been doing. Well, We're forming new paths to make them the default path, and I think a lot of that we add some intentional pleasure into the process to really anchor some of those thoughts that we choose. We ask a lot of things about what would it be like if I didn't have that thought? What if I had that thought? this thought instead? It's so exciting to see the results of this process and how it can be foundational for being able to set up a strategy to bring the change that you want to be able to create one of the things that I learned from this webinar. The Dr. Fogg's book is that change happens best by feeling good, not by feeling bad. And we get to manage all of that ourselves. So it's not just about willpower and accountability or the promises that you make yourself. All of those things kind of come into play when you want them to. and if you make them enjoyable, even better. So I want to go back to talking about the role of routine and building momentum. That is kind of where we started because establishing a routine creates that predictable pattern that helps in maintaining focus and consistency. minimizes that decision fatigue. So I mentioned that after my three days of working, I would get up the next day and feel like I had to start all over and making decisions. So by reducing those number of choices that we have to make every day, this is where meal planning comes into play and really writing a. So if you're writing down your intentions for the week and your goals, those three things that you're going to finish by Friday, this is all going to help conserve mental energy for more critical tasks. If you have all of those things already decided, then on the day that you have or in the time that you have to make them happen, you don't have to, you've already done that work. wrote a book called Grit, the Power of Passion and Perseverance. It's another one that highlights the significance of routine in achieving long term goals. Her research indicates that individuals who stick to routines and exhibit perseverance are more likely to succeed than those who rely on bursts of inspiration and motivation. And I think that was so profound to me to really get a hold of that and be able to do some thought work around that and see where I was doing that, because that's what I was doing. I was going for three days to my work, and then I would get up on the fourth day and Look for that burst of inspiration and motivation. And sometimes it just wasn't there because I was tired, but making those decisions ahead of time has changed everything. Routine also helps with developing discipline. I'm not looking for inspiration or motivation. I'm just going to do it. So when tasks are performed regularly, they become ingrained. in our daily life, leading to that disciplined approach towards work and personal goals. This also applies to working out. The decision is made, and this is why accountability works so well. If I have committed to my friend to meet at yoga class, I'm going, I've decided, I committed, and I know she's counting on seeing me. So I'm going to go where if I am kind of wishy washy about it, and I'm not. And I'm going to wait and decide later. I'm probably not going. once I'm in a rhythm and it's routine, I don't have to think so hard about it. And I will just go because I know it's good for me and I already decided. This discipline fueled by routine keeps momentum going, when the motivation isn't there. Make it fun. Track the progress. Maintain a journal. So I love a journal for this. There are a lot of digital tools that you can track your progress. the Growth Day app is great for that. I love to use that. You can actually even set any, it really applies to any goals you can track. You can set your strategy, set reminders, put it in your calendar, use the Growth Day app for that. There's even a journal in there. So that would be a one stop shop for tracking progress, setting those goals, developing the routines. The link is in the show notes if you want access to that app. I use it every day. I love it. It's one of the few apps that I've used consistently for a couple of years and just really, and I can't, can't recommend it enough. of course adjusting and adapting to be flexible and just willing to adapt your routine as you learn, I told you it took me over time to, to really work out that six week. rhythm for my coaching practice and to be able to work all of that in so that I can set it so that I can gain the momentum that I need. Life is dynamic and making some adjustments is always going to be necessary to maintain a rhythm and then incorporate rest and recovery in there as well. It's just as important to rest to ensure you have periods of rest to ensure that you have those times of rest and recovery to avoid burnout. I think a lot of us don't build those things into our calendar. Rest and recovery that reset, refreshing. Those are all things that those can't be random either. we're socialized, especially as women too. Always be productive, always be moving, always be doing something. And that means that we can't also spend all of our spare times serving others. Um, and that might be. Family going to things that we don't want to go to just to be supportive or just to do the things that are, maybe we think are expected. There's this there's kind of a social conditioning there. So we also can't be random about the times that we build in to reset and refresh and do that self care. So that also needs to be in the system Needs to be built in as part of your rhythm, not left to randomness. Notice how our body is responding, the feelings that are coming up, the feelings are going to tell you what the thoughts are that are going to block you. So learn from that. And this is something We really master this in coaching. So, by not judging, taking your aspirations, break them down into tiny behaviors, embracing mistakes and learning from them to make it feel good. to move forward and making it fun. And we can only really do that if we're really noticing and paying attention and personalizing that strategy. You don't have to do the thing that the woman in the sauna said, but take some of those ideas that sound fun and put them into your own strategy and make it your own momentum and personal and professional growth is significantly influenced by the concept of rhythm. Versus randomness Creating a rhythm that sustains momentum consistency is key. As you build your rhythm, you'll find that your efforts compound and leading to, substantial, even exponential growth and success over time. I hope this is helpful to you and that you're picking up some of the mindset shifts that go along with this. I do this a lot in coaching, doing a lot of, I'm calling it the cognitive climb because it really is climbing from one thought to another until we get the right one. The thought that is going to produce the outcome that we want, because we know that thoughts trigger emotions that influence behavior that ultimately give us the outcome that we want. So if we reverse engineer all of that and we look at what is the outcome that we want, we need to be able to identify those thoughts. All right. If you enjoyed this episode, share it with a friend because a journey is much more enjoyable when we honor that we are wired for community. And when we hang with the right people, we grow. And that means hanging out in the sauna with people who are investing in themselves so that you want to invest in yourself more too, then let's go. and if you want some help designing your strategy that works for you, then click that link below and schedule a discovery call. Let's see what the next steps look like for you to break up your aspirations into tiny pieces and gain the momentum that gives, keeps you moving forward because really isn't the pain of regret worse than the pain of growth? I know not everyone thinks so, we think we have to have growth or peace, and we can have both, and we get that peace as we start to grow. Like I said before, discomfort is something that's going to come your way anyway, You might as well choose the option where you also get the reward. I know not everyone thinks so. I do. Maybe you do too. So, stop judging yourself. get clear on your aspirations and design that strategy that really works for you. And learn to love the mistakes. Use them to move forward. and make it fun as you get up every day and default to yes, your extraordinary self.